I love it when things are all about me

This last weekend was our stake conference, and Dad came home from the priesthood leadership session on Saturday afternoon with news. The word from Salt Lake is that this year one of the main focuses for the Church is going to be the Young Single Adults. Specifically it's going to be about finding them, re-activating them, and retaining them. The numbers say that of all the members aged 18-30 only about 30% are active. It's the most at-risk age bracket in the Church.

This, to me, makes sense. It's easy to fall through the cracks when you're away from home for the first time and trying to figure things out. Plus that's just a generally turbulent time--we've got school and jobs and relationships and growing up and all kinds of stuff. And it's likely the most nomadic time we'll ever have. With all that moving around, it's even easier to drop off when the wards you move to don't make you feel included and welcomed and needed.

Example: I moved to Loughborough last year as a university student and attended a family ward. After some initial standoffishness, the ward members made friends with me. I got a calling (working with the nursery kids). I got home teachers and visiting teachers. I was asked to speak in Church. I felt like I belonged there and I was sad to leave.

However, a friend of mine moved into a different ward in the same stake. Her experience was not good. No one tried to befriend her. She never got a calling even though she asked for one. I don't know if she ever got home teachers or visiting teachers. It was a 45-minute walk to church each week. She said when people talked to her it was usually to ask when she was leaving. She could so easily have stopped going, and it's possible that no one would have noticed.

Luckily, she was not a brand-new 18-yr-old away from home for the first time. She was older and had a strong testimony, and church attendance was important to her even if the other members ignored her. Plus she was only going to be there for a year. But what if she had been a brand-new 18-yr-old away from home for the first time? What if she had been feeling lonely and homesick and shaky in her testimony? Do you think she would actually stick that out for three years of college? I don't think so. She would be out of there--and if no one cared enough to go after her she might never come back.

So yes, that kind of junk needs to stop. We are worth being welcomed and fellowshipped and it's not fair to write off students or young single people as "temporary" members of the ward. Instead people need to recognize that by ignoring and failing us they are damaging the future of the Church. I hope my friend's experience is the exception rather than the rule, but that doesn't make it any less of a serious problem.

I'm encouraged to see that the Church's stated focus is on finding, reactivating and retaining the YSAs rather than just telling us to get married. Again. Some more. Yes, marriage is important and it needs to be emphasized, but if the YSAs start to feel like they don't belong unless they're married then they won't stay. I think the Church recognizes that and is trying to move the focus on what members have to offer as individuals, rather than trying to lump everyone into categories.

Dad said they also announced that no new singles wards or branches will be created. The ones that exist will stay, but that's it. I wonder if this is the beginning of the end of singles wards. That wouldn't bother me too much, actually. I don't think they could get rid of them in places like BYU or other universities where there is a huge LDS student population, but in other areas they could.

I guess my final thought here is that I'm glad to be a part of a Church that thinks about these things. The basic doctrines won't ever change, but the Church actively looks for ways to adapt to the needs of a rapidly-growing membership, of whom single people of all ages and circumstances make up a rapidly-growing segment.

There you have it.

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