Games Nemesis

I got the following comment/request last week:

OK totally off subject. I haven't read your blog for a few weeks and found the "holding out for a hero" video very entertaining. But wait! I don't recognize some of those people! I thought I had seen most everything out there. So, please have mercy on me and help me compile a list of movies of that genre that haven't seen yet! Thanks! -a loyal but anonymous reader.

How can I refuse such a request?? I give the people what they want. Especially if what they want is my most favorite thing ever: Sumptuous Literary Adaptations. (See also: Regency Man Candy. Or Victorian Man Candy.)

Here are the movies featured in the Holding out for a Hero video as created by YouTube user (and my kind of girl) loony29.

Sense and Sensibility (1995) -- Brilliant, brilliant movie. Emma Thompson was nominated for Best Actress and won for Best Screenplay. She basically wrote the thing and got all her friends & neighbors to come be in it (Hugh Grant, Hugh Laurie, Imelda Staunton, etc.) Which, really, sounds like a fabulous idea to me. Remind me to do that. Kate Winslet snags her first of many Oscar nominations. Ang Lee directs. Hugh Grant minces around with a riding crop up his bum. Alan Rickman purrs that one line about the aaaair being fuuuullll of spices, which makes me pass out in my chair. Good times all around.

Mansfield Park (1999) -- The Austen purists hate this one. But it's hard to have much sympathy since the novel actually did need a bit of spicing up. I don't think it necessarily needed boobs, but oh well. Without a bit of artistic liberties, all you would really have is a movie where the heroine spends all her time going, "But that would be wrong!" What you get instead is a great movie w/some fabulous performances--especially Alessandro Nivola as Henry Crawford, who is supposed to be the bad guy but is so darn hot & appealing that lots of women wish Fanny had just gone ahead and picked him anyway. I'm not in that camp, but I understand that some women are.

Northanger Abbey (ITV 2007) This is the one that premiered on the telly in the UK this year and will be making its US debut on Masterpiece Theatre, along with the new Mansfield Park and Persuasion. You can watch it on YouTube now, though, if you can't wait til then. Which, let's be honest, I couldn't. The heroine is Catherine Moreland, who has a very active fantasy life from all the trashy gothic novels she reads. This movie includes one of the sweetest first kisses I've ever seen. It'll make you giggle it's just that precious.

Persuasion (ITV 2007) Okay, seriously? I have already talked about this movie, and if you people keep not watching it then we just can't be friends anymore. Really. It is absolutely wonderful. And I swear that Rupert Penry-Jones (Captain Wentworth) gets hotter and hotter every time I see him. Last time there was steam rising off my body. Go here now and start watching it.

Mansfield Park (ITV- 2007) Haven't seen this one yet and I understand it's the weak one of the three. Also the guys are hotter in the 1999 version. I'm just saying.

The Phantom of the Opera (2004) This was included in the video but I personally don't count it as a must-see. Even though Gerard Butler is smokin' hot and I have thought so ever since I caught him in a late-night Masterpiece Theatre airing of The Jury way back when.

Under the Greenwood Tree (2005) Thomas Hardy adaptation, haven't seen it yet. But I know now that I must. With all haste. Only it had better not turn out to be depressing like the rest of Hardy's stuff. Watch the heroine die under the Greenwood Tree.

Daniel Deronda (2002) I've only caught bits and pieces of this one but what I saw was great. Need to see the whole thing. Victorian costumes = good. Hugh Dancy = goooood.

Jane Eyre (2006) You may have already read my thoughts on this one, but to sum up: Best Jane Eyre Ever. All the other versions can just go home and cry. Ruth Wilson is perfect as Jane, and she even gets to pass out in one of my favorite spots in England. I can absolutely, absolutely get behind Toby Stephens as Mr. Rochester. Yes, he may be too hot. But do you see me complaining? Do you? I respect the filmmaker's craft!!!

North and South (2004) Before you start thinking that I've lost my mind and developed a Patrick Swayze fetish, this is not the North and South that is the miniseries from the 1980s about the American Civil War. At all. It's about the North and South of England, so right there you know it's going to be better. I finally saw this one in the last month, and Oh. My. Gosh. You need to watch this. Richard Armitage plays John Thornton and is amazing. His character makes a bad first impression (which is a departure from the book, movie people) and I didn't know how they were ever going to get me to like him. They found a way--by the end I couldn't decide whether to cry happy tears or make out with the TV screen. Watch out for the "Look back. Look back at me." scene. I dare you to keep it together.

So. Those are the ones from the Hero video. Other notables in my book:

Pride and Prejudice (1995): Duh. This one is pretty much The Mothership.

Pride & Prejudice (2005): Great, even with Keira Hipbones Poutyface McKnightley in it. Especially great for when you need a P&P fix but don't have 5 hours for the "real" one.

Persuasion (1995) Classic and wonderful . . . sigh.

Bleak House (2005) Haven't seen it yet, but it's next on my list and I already know I'll love it.

The Emmas (1996) One stars Gwyneth Paltrow and the other Kate Beckinsale before she turned plastic. They're very different & pick up on different things from the book, which is why you should watch both.

Our Mutual Friend (1998) Very long, but very good.

Twelfth Night (1996) The movie that first made me love Toby Stephens. You'll see. Also I've been to his castle, which means we should probably just get married already.

Great Expectations (1999) Horatio is in this movie. That is all you need know.

The Horatio Hornblower films (1998, 2001, 2003). Horatio is in these, too.

The Forsyte Sage (2002) Horatio is in this but he dies. I don't want to talk about it. The whole movie is kind of tragic.

Wives and Daughters (1999) Haven't seen it yet but want to. The novel is by Elizabeth Gaskell, who also wrote North and South.

Happy Monday, everyone!

update: I forgot to add these to my "want to see" list:

The Way We Live Now (2001) starring Shirley Henderson, Matthew Macfadyen, Cillian Murphy, and Miranda Otto.

He Knew He Was Right (2004) starring the very cool Bill Nighy

Middlemarch (1994) Rufus Sewell. That's all that needs to be said, really.