I'm in an elephant graveyard

Remember how a couple of weeks ago I talked about singles wards? Well now there's an entirely new thing to report, namely my new singles ward, about which I'm not sure what to think or feel.

Jenny & Ed's bishop turned up last week to say Hi and I asked him about the singles wards. He said there's a BYU ward for for the students & younger kiddies and a really big stake singles ward that seems to be populated by the 25+ crowd--a couple hundred of them.

This, to me, was good news. He said this ward must be good, because it had people driving down from SLC to be in it, which confused me a little bit. Usually it's only the really tiny wards who are so desperate for members that they'll fudge on the boundaries.

So on Sunday I got all dolled up in my cute brown Wal-Mart skirt and my light-pink boat-neck 3/4-sleeved tee and my hot brown shoes. I planned to get there early but didn't actually sit down in the chapel until the opening hymn had started. Hate that. Now my family will heap scorn upon me.

The ward choir (2 boys, 12 girls, 2 tone-deaf loud boys, bless them) sang and people gave talks and all that normal stuff. The chapel was packed with people. But as I looked around I saw a lot of people who did not seem to be in their 20s so much. More like 30s. And possibly older. When the bishop got up to make announcements he welcomed the visitors and new people and told us all to fill out a new member sheet to determine if we're "eligible" for membership in the ward. Kind of like it was a country club or something.

So. While I was out in the hall getting my picture taken for the ward directory, I asked a few not-so-subtle questions and figured out what was going on here in CrazyWardVilleLand. This ward is a special ward, with special rules. The age limit has been increased to 40, and, in some circumstances, 45. Which explains why a grey-haired man came up and introduced himself to me. Some people don't even join the ward--they just get their name in the directory and they come to all the social events, of which there are many (4 this week). These people are called "permanent visitors." One girl I talked to lives in Springville and attends a ward there in the mornings and then comes up to this one in the afternoons. Another girl said she tried the family wards for a few years but got sick of being put into Primary so she started coming here.

One cool thing about this ward, though, is that there are a LOT of international members. The girl who taught the Relief Society lesson is either from Brazil or Portugal, there are Korean and Chinese members, and I talked to a couple of guys and a girl from Latin America. I think I heard a South African accent during Gospel Doctrine. I'm not sure why that is, but that's fun.

It was kind of disorienting, I must say. Of course I've only met a few people so far, but it's just funny. My standards for how young I'll go have totally fallen by the wayside--I'll date a 21-yr-old if he's smart & mature & with it. I just didn't think I would end up needing to decide how old I'll go. Because it turns out I still have some rules there. And 45 is a bit high. Because you just know that's how Michael Douglas gets out of stuff.

"Sorry, Catherine, my hip is acting up again. If I change a diaper the whole thing might just pop right out!"

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