Today I wore a fitted black t-shirt and a pair of black (secretly yoga) pants to work. And then I led two different storytimes and quite possibly jogged the baby loose with all the antics I must do as part of said events. (Seriously, I'm pretty sure I know how labor is going to start, and it's going to involve "Shake My Sillies Out," a sudden gush of fluid, possibly a head or foot, and a room-full of permanently-damaged toddlers.)
I did receive several compliments on the outfit and accompanying bump, which I treasured and am writing down so that 10 or so weeks from now I can remember the good ol' days when people said things like, "Hey, you make pregnancy look cute!" instead of just staring at me with a horrified expression and running away lest I explode and get fluids and other matter on them like something out of Cloverfield.
One girl, upon hearing that I'm 7 months pregnant, exclaimed at how small I still appear to be and wondered if my doctors are concerned at all. Which is when I started wondering if maybe I look smaller today because the baby has, in fact, started shrinking--probably because I'm not eating enough or drinking enough water and the amniotic fluid is drying up and it's all my fault. I called GH up to discuss this with him.
Only it turns out he maybe already has too many worries going on to tackle the one about whether the baby is shrinking. On his list: Is the apartment we're looking to move into a former meth lab? How can we be sure? What about the smoker who lived there before? Could the smoke still be in the walls, lurking in wait to brain-damage our child? And why is there an exterminator parked in front of the complex? Are they spraying chemicals? What kind of chemicals? Is that how the child is going to end up brain damaged?
To reassure him, I called the potential future landlord who said that the apartment has not been a meth lab. To reassure myself, I ate a high-fiber open-faced chili dog sandwich. And put a peach cobbler in the oven. Never let it be said your mama doesn't love you, baby.






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