If I had to look like the 80s threw up on me . . .

Recently I visited a friend at her in-law's house and noticed that her wedding pictures were up on the wall, as well as those of another couple. Judging from the woman's dress, it appeared that they'd been married sometime between 1984 and 1989. Wanting to see how close I was, I asked my friend when the people in the picture were married.

My friend kind of smiled and said, "Oh, that's my sister-in-law and her husband. And they actually . . . weren't married that long ago." I must have looked confused because of the awfulness of the dress, because she quickly added, "That was somebody else's dress. A relative came to my s-in-l and said it would mean so much if she would wear it, and since my s-in-l is really nice, she said okay."

Okay, seriously, relative-from-the-80s? Shouldn't it mean enough that YOU got to wear the dress back when YOU, in a fit of wrong-time-period-living, chose it? Why would you attempt to make some young bride's special day all about being an ode to this awful thing that YOU liked when YOU got married liked rather than, say, I dunno, a dress SHE might like?

I mean, it is one thing to say, "Hey, if you're looking for something used or vintage, I still have my dress and it's in good shape. No pressure, but you're free to take a look if you like." And this is an offer that should be made only by women whose dresses were designed OUTSIDE of the years 1980-1992.

These are the new rules, people. Mark them well.

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