Need to reduce blood pressure

My sister called me yesterday and told me about the freaking BYU dumbheads who, when she went in to pick up her cap & gown for graduation, asked if she was picking it up for her husband!!! I completely lost my mind and began bellowing and sputtering in the manner of a wounded moose or rabid bull:

WHAAAAAAAAAATTTT?????
WRAAAAAOOOOOEEERRR!!!!
EEEEEUUURRRNNNGGGGHH!!
KILL EVERYOOOOONNE!!!

I---Just---Yeah. Some people should not be given speaking parts. Also, you would think that this young female who has been handing out caps and gowns all week to a graduating class of 49% females and 51% males should maybe realize that there could be another reason why a woman would come in to pick up a cap and gown. But then, maybe this girl thinks that all the graduating females actually earned their degrees for their husbands too. That or she hasn't fully recovered from the cranium-from-colon-removal surgery.

And now we're going to look at pretty pictures of English flowers, and possibly listen to some soothing classical music in order to calm down and remind ourselves that the world is not completely full of idiots. I know this because you and I and my sister, who worked her tail off to graduate and has my respect and admiration forever, are still in it.

All is not lost.

Posted in: England