Yesterday Spitfire and I went to a local restaurant for a tasting because I'm booking the wedding luncheon there. We can both tell you this now: If someone asks you if you'd like to have a tasting? Say yes.
They fed us three different kinds of salad and four different entrees. The salads were an attempt to sway me from my genius "ditch the salad which nobody cares about and put that money towards the appetizers, which are beautiful and delicious and make excellent camera fodder" plan. The salads, while lovely and tasty, didn't sway me. We also had teriyaki chicken, a fabulous chicken cordon bleu with raspberry sauce and asparagus, macadamia-encrusted halibut with fresh blueberries, raspberries, & mango, and a Parmesan-encrusted halibut with crab, hollandaise, and sliced avocado on top.
Yeah. Tastings rule.
So we were talking about the menu and about desserts and fruit tarts and things. And then the owner turns to me and says, "So are you having kids?"
They fed us three different kinds of salad and four different entrees. The salads were an attempt to sway me from my genius "ditch the salad which nobody cares about and put that money towards the appetizers, which are beautiful and delicious and make excellent camera fodder" plan. The salads, while lovely and tasty, didn't sway me. We also had teriyaki chicken, a fabulous chicken cordon bleu with raspberry sauce and asparagus, macadamia-encrusted halibut with fresh blueberries, raspberries, & mango, and a Parmesan-encrusted halibut with crab, hollandaise, and sliced avocado on top.
Yeah. Tastings rule.
So we were talking about the menu and about desserts and fruit tarts and things. And then the owner turns to me and says, "So are you having kids?"
And I swear I almost answered, "Well, not right away but eventually, yeah."
Only then I realized he was probably talking about whether we were having kids at the luncheon. Which made more sense. And was less of an impertinent question. It's just that everyone has been warning me that this is the question which comes next. That it will always be the Question People Ask. And I think I've pretty much figured out what I'm going to say.
My first idea is to tell askers that Gentleman Friend has sperm motility issues. So then they'd feel really bad for bringing it up. And once I did get pregnant it would be like this Medical Miracle and I'd probably score tons of awesome presents.
But really? What are people even looking for when they ask that? Do they want to hear all about how you're trying to get your endometriosis under control first? Or do they want to know that your spouse isn't actually excited about the idea of kids ever since you two got stuck in that nursery calling where you get vomited on every week? Maybe they just want to hear, "Yes, we're trying actively! In fact, that's where we were during the break between Sacrament Meeting and Sunday School--trying actively in the custodial closet. Cross fingers that today's the day, Sister!"
So my response to such questions will be to respond, "Gosh, when do you think we should have kids?" Or, if I'm feeling more charitable, I'll just turn the conversation back to them and ask how they went about their family planning. Not that it's any of my business, and not that I care, but clearly they want to chat about reproduction in some way. Which is fine as long as it's not about my reproduction.
Has anyone else hit on any good responses?
My first idea is to tell askers that Gentleman Friend has sperm motility issues. So then they'd feel really bad for bringing it up. And once I did get pregnant it would be like this Medical Miracle and I'd probably score tons of awesome presents.
But really? What are people even looking for when they ask that? Do they want to hear all about how you're trying to get your endometriosis under control first? Or do they want to know that your spouse isn't actually excited about the idea of kids ever since you two got stuck in that nursery calling where you get vomited on every week? Maybe they just want to hear, "Yes, we're trying actively! In fact, that's where we were during the break between Sacrament Meeting and Sunday School--trying actively in the custodial closet. Cross fingers that today's the day, Sister!"
So my response to such questions will be to respond, "Gosh, when do you think we should have kids?" Or, if I'm feeling more charitable, I'll just turn the conversation back to them and ask how they went about their family planning. Not that it's any of my business, and not that I care, but clearly they want to chat about reproduction in some way. Which is fine as long as it's not about my reproduction.
Has anyone else hit on any good responses?
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