Barely thawed

L**** is cold, y'all. The interview went well, I think, and now I'm waiting to hear. I really, really liked the library. Here were my two favorite questions:

"So, hypothetically, if you were supervising two library pages who were both teenage girls and who kind of didn't get along, how would you handle that?"

"I have to ask--is your hair naturally curly?"

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Mood = Elated.

Why am I elated? Read thy below.

[quote = Richard from Decknique]I got in touch with one of the animators on the Cingular Blackjack commercial, Kiel Figgins. It turns out a video from Decknique was used as reference! (More details below)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kiel Figgins Yeah, I had a hand (no pun intended) in that TV spot. I animated the section shown on my site... I also supervised my team of animators who did the tricks that followed. The first part of the spot was done in-house at Shilo Designs.

They did use two reference videos, and one really short clip. They took the reference videos, spliced them together into the order of the moves you see in the video. Then they used that final reference video to develop the 3D animation.

None of their animators are actually cardists. They just had the reference videos to go from.

Some interesting facts:

• Their reference for the first move was actually an Anaconda. I'm guessing it turned into a spring since that's what most people are used to.
• Their fan in the video is actually spreading upside down.. so the bottom cards were spread out last instead of the top cards.
• They *did* have a reference for the last move where the card was spinned on its edge on the model's finger: it was originally a simple face-down card twirl on the finger.
• One of the two main reference videos was Jam Time submitted by Jaspas! Yes, that's where the Anaconda and Tornado came from.

I was also given a link to the Press Release about this spot, as well as a link to a high quality version of the commercial.[/quote]

And, I'm the one doing Tornado in that video! =D This definitely made my day and week! Yay! No amount of 'yays' is enough. lol.

I'm loving cardistry even more now. [PRIDE!]

Happy Ling,
30th November.

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Interview Prep

So I'm driving to L**** today for the job interview. Any good vibes would be most appreciated. Please pray that I will either

a) get the job
b) get the job with a surprise $10,000 pay raise because they just like me that much
c) be offered the job but have the good sense to run if they're going to turn out to be axe murderers who lull attractive would-be librarians into their facilities on false pretences

I've been going over interview questions to prepare myself. Here's what I have so far.

Q: How much supervision have you typically received in your previous jobs?
A: Not much in the beginning, but then more and more as time went on.

Q: What would you say are areas needing improvement?
A: Hygeine. And reading skills.

Q: What is the most important thing you are looking for in a job?
A: Lots of down-time for blogging. And it probably wouldn't be wise to have me interacting with the public much.

Q: What things give you the greatest satisfaction at work?
A: Quiet acts of insubordination.

Q: What approach do you take to get your people together to establish a common approach to a problem?
A: Beatings. Much beatings.

Q: What motivated you to seek a library degree?
A: I was sick of working full-time, and as a librarian I would get summers off.

Q: What kind of books do you read?
A: Mormon historical romance. And the scriptures. I think that's all you need, really.

I pretty much have this thing in the bag.

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Dinner at Deviants Palace backwards!

=)

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Blind Date Scoop

Okay, sorry to the people who feel like I'm withholding vast amounts of information from them on the blind date front. The short version is that I had a really nice time--it was one of the better dates I've been on and definitely the best blind date.

Of course, to give that some perspective, let me tell you what my blind dates are usually like. This one time a girl who shall remain nameless (except that her name is *tanclax) set me up with a friend of hers after raving all about how great he is.

First off, she lied to each of us to make the age difference seem smaller. I was 21, he was 28 or something.

He picked me up and said he was feeling like soup because he was getting over a cold. I said that sounded fine.

Him: "I was thinking Souper Salad, because I have a friend who might be working there and could get us a discount."

Me: Blink. "Ooooo-kay."

Please let me explain. Souper Salad is ghetto. It's where you go to get all-you-can-eat soup and salad for $2.95. The decor was horrible, with light pink and light green as the main colors. It's where Brian David Mitchell used to eat. That's the kind of classy place we're talking about.

He circled the parking lot twice, looking for his friend's car. When he couldn't find it he sighed this deep frustrated sigh and said, "Well, I guess we might as well go in." Please don't ask me where he thought we were going to get cheaper food, unless we went dumpster diving.

We went inside and as soon as we sat down his friend appeared. She pulled up a chair at the table and the two of them proceeded to talk to each other for the next 45 minutes. She did most of the talking--specifically about how much she hates Utah and how she really really needs to have some sex. I ate my soup and wondered why her manager didn't come over and fire her.

Then he took me home, said he would call, and never did.

I really wish now that I'd just gotten up and called a friend to come get me. And that I'd told him exactly what a lousy date he was. But this was back when I was nice. And 21.

So when I said that I'd been on the best blind date ever, that doesn't mean I've eloped to Vegas. But it was really nice. The setter-uppers were friends of my Mom. We went up to Temple Square to see the lights and then walked over to the Gateway Mall for Mexican food. Temple Square pleased me by including the bubble lights in the reflecting pool, which I appreciate. Some years they've skimped on that. The nicest thing was that we just ended up having lots of things in common and plenty to talk about--movies, books, plays, music, traveling, all sorts of things. And I never once had to feign interest in competitive sports. He was nice, funny, polite, and wore a very attractive sweater. At the end of the evening he said he'd had a great time and would love to go out again. I said the same.

That is all.

note: not my picture, but you can get the idea of the bubble lights.

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Count Filth is amusing everyone.

Was half-grinning at myself when I read this interview dialog, which involves, of course, my idol, Count Filth.

Here's it!

If you could be drowned in anything, what would it be?
Naked female flesh. Or booze. Or Lovecraftian tentacles.

Have you had any near-death experiences?
Once on mushrooms. I transcended the universe, becoming one with God until a friend's persistent nagging brought me back from beyond the veils of death and into his rather manky flat in Colchester.

Definitely a mushroom But is it magic?

What are your favourite websites?
Secretary porn and weird and wonderful sports cars.

If you could make one already-written book as important and integral to Western society as the Bible, what would it be?
The gospel of FILTH [not a real book – library-bound Ed].

Do you believe in a God?
Yes I do, although it is an amalgam of all the relevant bits of other religious deities, including of course, the nasty ones. To avoid debates with so-called people-in-the-know, I get away with saying I'm a pagan.

What's your favourite alternative porn title for a Hollywood blockbuster?
Schindler's Fist.

What is your favourite country?
England, because despite all it's faults, I'm a patriot.

Are you a vegetarian?
Hardly. I like blood too much.

What has been your most notable experience with fans and admirers?
They have all been good. Our fans are the dog's bollocks and are continually surprising us with their dedication to the cause and, of course, their endless enthusiasm for our musical output.

The band spends so much time together, how do you stay friends?
Voodoo dolls, love triangles, lawsuits and forced grins.

What advice would you give someone coming to one of your gigs?
Try not to fall in love with the elder guitarist, bring stout earplugs and perhaps a little picnic for the interval.

Voodoo!

What's your favourite booze and why?
All of them… because I'm an alcoholic.

What's your favourite drug and why?
Cocaine, although I rarely do it for that reason alone.

Who or what do you miss the most?
My wife and daughter every time I go out on tour. Oh, and my cat and Ultimate Dalek.

What's your favourite childhood memory?
A holiday at my grandparents had whilst moving schools.

What was your worst haircut?
A dye job when I was at sixth form that went wrong (it went orange), one that my mother contributed to by misjudging an under shave and making it bald. For about a week I looked like a ginger vulture.

On a scale of 1-10, how good do you look naked?
It depends what sex is looking. Since my detox diet, I reckon I could pass as an eight if the viewer didn't see my face.

Name three things you could not live without.
Sex. Cars. Heavy metal music.

---

Dani Filth strongly and sternly suggests that you DiScover New Project, Eggs Benedict and Dimmu Borgir. Yeah, I didn’t think you’d have heard of them either! Failing that, he would say you should go to Wacken Festival in Germany. He says it’s “metal central” and he’s absolutely correct.

LOL. I love the part about Lovecraftian tentacles and Schindler's Fist. Hohoho!

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Thanksgiving Weekend Highlights

Didn't have to do any of the Thanksgiving cooking

Cheeseball was a rousing success among the discerning, even if b-in-law said it looked white trash

4 slices of pumpkin pie

Slept in rather than waiting in line overnight at Best Buy with the crazy people

Under-inflated tires mercifully did not explode during the 4 hours of driving time

Asked the doctor about my dodgy mole--turns out it's a wart

Yay for having warts rather than cancer!

Went on pretty much the best blind date I've ever had

And now I'm driving to L**** on Wednesday for my job interview but they're predicting this huge snowstorm for Monday - Wednesday. So let's hope I don't get caught in the mercy of both the elements and the Utah drivers who respect neither the elements or my desire to keep living. And yes, I am now one who firmly hates the reckless Utah drivers with a white-hot fiery passion that causes my head to spin completely around while lightening shoots out my eyes and fingernails.

I can't even talk about it without getting all frothy at the mouth.

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Fruition

Fruition because of 3 things.

One.

Metal shall invade the minds of the commonspeople on Sunday. My Thornography CD Review will be published this Sunday in the GenY PlayBox feature. No mercy will be reserved, no one will be spared. Tonight, (Everyone will be) in Flames as the uninformed public cower Under Huntress Moon, due to their witnessing of the Rise of The Pentagram. Following suit without much delay, The Bryonic Man - none other than Count Dani, himself, annouces the Foetus of A New Day Kicking. Rising up from her Cetemetry and Sundown, Dani's eternal Lovesick for Mina shall be fully satisfied, whilst Dirge Inferno resonates throughout the abyss of the Earth, for this Temptation is too great.

In simpler, layspeople term, get The Sunday Times and start worshipping Cradle of Filth. =)

Two.

I got my pay! Yay! Unaffected by the meagre sum of currency I am receiving, I have a whole list of opportunity costs to fulfill, ranging from Falkenbach's CD to Hannah Ardent's Origins of Totalitarianism book. If there's one thing on Earth that should go into extinction, it'd be "unlimited human wants". Otherwise, I could have avoided from the pains of typing and searching for dates, titles all day long. Ugh. Anyway, yes, I'm slightly richer now. And no, I'm no philanthropist.

Three.

My once-defunct webcam is working again! Happy flourish-mad me immediately grabbed my deck (I know what you're thinking, sicko) and took numerous pictures of it. Here's it! =D

I just love my cards too much. =D

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Rammstein Heil!

Almost Rammstein You scored 130 Rammsteinism!

Congrats, you're a heavy duty fan! Not quite the Rammsteinmeister yet, but you're pretty dern close. And since you're at the 'almost Rammstein' level, you get an 'almost Rammstein' pic. You get the beautiful... Fraustein! Ain't they gorgeous?

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 33% on lyric knowledge

Link: The Rammstein lyrics Test written by fallen_fright on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test If I get anything lower than this, I'd kill myself straight!

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The holiday where you don't have to buy people stuff

We're going up to Logan in the morning for Thanksgiving with the people who are pretty much our second family. I haven't seen them in awhile so I'm looking forward to it. And since the dad is a doctor I'm hoping he'll take a look at the dodgy mole on my arm. Can't decide if it's better to show it to people before or after they've eaten. I guess I could save it for any conversational lulls during dinner.

Jenny made her famous cheesecake and the stupid oven messed it up. It'll still taste wonderful, though. I'm making my cheeseball, which is the thing I always fall back on when I need to bring a contribution. And since I've had friends ask for the recipe, I will include it here as my Thanksgiving gift to you. Please be warned that it's not posh or gourmet, but it is addicting.

I apologize in advance that there are no measurements.

Put 1 or 2 packages cream cheese or Neufchatel, softened, in a bowl. Do not use light cream cheese, for it is the devil's cheese.

Then add:

grated cheddar cheese
chopped green onion (spring onion to you Britishers--the green and white parts)
little bit of garlic or garlic powder
little bit of seasoned salt
dash of Worchestershire sauce
crumbled bacon if you want to go all decadent

Taste frequently, and don't let anyone give you any crap about it becase YOU'RE the one making the thing, dangit.

The least messy way for the next step is to let the cheese mixture set for a while in the fridge. Then it keeps its shape better when you roll it into a ball or log. Dump chopped pecans on a clean surface or saran wrap and roll the ball around until it's covered in nuts. Serve with Wheat thin crackers and anything else that sounds good.

note: not my picture

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Flourish!

I can't even remember when exactly I have flourished for more than an hour straight. Been too long. Due to incessant work and school, the first draining away all my time away.

Yesternight saw the crazy 8 hour long flourishing session by myself, spanning from 8pm to 3am. Plugged to my headphones with a good source of metal songs, cards in my hands, and flourish away. Yay. It feels good.

Other things, I loathe Singapore's censorship so bad. 3 days into the release date of Völkerball DVD, and not one copy is out on the shelves yet. And visiting Herzeleid.net makes me feel even more agonized, seeing people from other countries already have their Limited Edition (which costs US$100).

Still on the censorship, I look at the movies that are opening soon. 80% of them are either M-18 (50 or so days to go!) and R-21. Come on, shows like Tenacious D - the lame-ass comedy of Jack Black, are M-18 due to coarse language. Oh pleeze, kids are cursing "CB", "KNN", being exposed to various forms of violence in games, internet at ages as young as 13 or so. I don't get it. This world and society is going retrograde. Let's go back to the caves, tribespeople! Hiaz.

It's good to be the Little Horn,
LingNemesis
23th November 2006 CE

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Not to be a mommy blogger or anything

It has been fun living with the kiddies for the past couple of weeks. It's especially fun to watch Savvy try to manipulate everyone around her. She has decided that pretty much everything belongs to her. "THAT'S MINES!!" is her most-used expression, I think. Unless you count the way that she'll keep repeating a demand over and over again, especially when we're in the car.

I want jelly beans, Momma.

I want jelly beans, Momma.

Hey, I want jelly beans, Momma.

Momma I want jelly beans.

Because the only reason we haven't given in yet is that we just couldn't hear her properly.

My absolute favorite, though, is her way of asking for things.

Savvy: I wan' mumble mumble jeybeans mumble mumble Eat Thins mumble

Me: (trying to translate) You want me to feed you jelly-beans and ice cream while you push baby Ethan down over and over again and laugh maniacally?

Savvy: (brightly) Okay!

Then she sniggers to herself at how easily tricked these humans are.

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Oh!

Der Kommandant Achtung! You are 23% brainwashworthy, 63% antitolerant, and 71% blindly patriotic

Opportunistic, patriotic to a fault, and not so fond of people who aren't just like you, you are like a Nazi General. Back in Germany in the 1940's, you would have been at the top of the asshole list. Not for Nazism, necessarily, but for your own sick, twisted values. Then, out of superior intelligence (relative to other Nazis, that is), you would've climbed to the top. Conclusion: you would have been a Nazi, and most likely would have served them well. - new test, it rules, take it - The Terrorism Test

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 9% on brainwashworthy You scored higher than 95% on antitolerant You scored higher than 95% on patriotic

Link: The Would You Have Been a Nazi Test written by jason_bateman on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test So, I am supposed to be a facist authoritarian country-loving O'Brien? Hiaz.

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Randstein - Tonne

Hahaha. Lol. I like the Eins Zwei Drei ... part on the beer bottles. If you don't know German, you won't get it. Lol.

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Sooo much chocolate

I went to that Chocolate Show over the weekend with my Jenny, Hannah, and HT. They are good people to spend an evening with. Also HT told me that my hair inspired her to get a perm (which looks really nice on her, btw.) I was kind of floored, though, because I have never, ever, in my life, ever, been One Whose Appearance Inspires Emulation. Ever. I am glad that you were able to witness this day with me.

We got off to a late start because of all the BYU football game traffic and then the really freaky on/off ramps when you're trying to get on I-15 coming from the west but the on-ramp is all curvy so you can't go more than 25 mph around the curve but then BAM it spills you out onto the freeway where people are trying to kill you. Plus it was dark and I'm still getting used to driving again. I found finger-grip marks left in the upholstery after we dropped the girls off.

The Chocolate Show had much, much chocolate. There were flavored chocolates and chocolate fountains and truffles and fudge and chocolate popcorn and hot chocolate and chocolate milk and every good thing. There were also some people who I didn't think really needed to be there, as they did not add to my chocolate consumption:

• This very weathered and adversarial lady pushing the Salt Lake Tribune on us.
• A guy who wanted us to come test some luxury condos in Park City but took it back when he found out that we did not make the minimum required income. I'm not sure what part of "Sorry, we're too poor for that" he didn't get when I first said it.
• Wedding photographers.
• A company which peddled diet chocolate. I steered clear of them.
• The jewelry people. I swear, wherever there are booths, there will be jewelry people. I don't love the jewelry people.
  

Getting there near the end turned out to be a good idea because the vendors just wanted to get rid of stuff by then. The See's Chocolate rep shoved handfuls of chocolate lollipops at us. I got a caramel & chocolate dipped Granny Smith apple for $2.50 instead of $6.50.

Alan Osmond was there auctioning off the chocolate sculptures to support a children's charity. They auctioned things like "this chocolate sculpture and a Donny Osmond tour jacket" and "this chocolate sculpture and two Marie Osmond dolls which will come to life while you sleep and grow claws and kill your children."

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The wait is almost over! The hype is reaching its peak! My body is surged with adrenaline! My wallet is ready to take the blow of it! My hands are trembling, for they shall be holding the Ultimate Rammstein DVD to date by 12 noon tomorrow!

VOELKERBALL TOMORROW!


Gah!!! As I shout out my battlecry, my mind is flooded with millions of thoughts, ranging from "I must fucking blast this hell of a DVD once I reach home!" to "I will be shit broke after getting it! Oh holy!" But I tell myself firmly, "No time for fickle-mindedness, my friend! Voelkerball is paramount!" Yes, I listened to myself.

From popping the Rosenrot Bonus DVD into my player a little more than a year ago, amazed at the splendour of a Rammstein Live show, I was informed by the forums that that Rosenrot DVD is just a mere sneak preview of what Voelkerball is going to be. I knew it, I have to get it!

Rammstein's Voelkerball! Hier Ich kommen lauft fuer es! Ich habt gewarten fuer es ein langen zeit! AHHHHH. Kann warte fuer es nicht mehr!

I don't mind seeing a dozen of Ginger kids with braces mouthing "ist nur eine schmale Brücke" during Du Reischt so Gut in Voelkerball. Just give me Voelkerball! Blehhhh.

Why does metal paraphernalia have to torture its fans with such-insane releases and long, agonising waits? ARGH.

Voelkerball, hier Ich kommen!

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And I saw that it was good

Last week AA and I met up for lunch at Cafe Rio, where I got reacquainted with the marvelous thing that is the Cafe Rio salad. Normally I get mine with chicken but they've bumped up the prices since I was there last. When I got done sputtering and talking about how back in my day prices were much more reasonable and young whippersnappers respected their elders, I ordered one without meat. Of course I still couldn't finish it. The next day Jenny and I split the leftovers and added more lettuce, tomatoes, and cheese. So I got three meals out of the thing. Darn straight.

Here is me being happy with my salad. Don't let the tired, vacant look and flat desert-hating hair fool you.

It starts with the warm tortilla. Then it's rice, black beans, meat, romaine lettuce, pico de gallo, a scoop of guacamole, fresh cilantro, crispy chip strips, a sprinkling of cojita cheese (no idea where to find that, but that's what they use) and 2 lime segments.

Here is a copycat recipe for the salad. I can't vouch for it or anything, but it's worth a shot. Jen says the dressing is good, but not as good as the real thing, which I would drink from a carton if I could. This girl uses pork but I like chicken instead.

Note for UK friends: Cilantro = Coriander. And I don't know what you're going to do about the black beans, since I certainly never found cans of those things when I was in England. Maybe you can find them dry somewhere. And I don't know where you can find tomatillos.

Cafe Rio Salad

Recipe By: pinkdaisy (as found at Mormonchic.com)

Sweet Pork:

• 1 (3-5 pound) pork roast-boneless pork loin recommended
• 1 cup salsa-use Pace or one similar, not the fresh salsas
• 1 cup brown sugar, packed

Place ingredients in a greased slow cooker. Cover and cook on LOW heat for 8-10 hours. Shred pork with a fork or potato masher before serving. Keep lid off after shredding for about 15 minutes so juice will thicken. Use meat in burritos, tacos, or salads. If freezing, keep juice and freeze with meat.

Cilantro-Lime Rice:

• 1 cup uncooked rice
• 1 teaspoon butter or margarine
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 teaspoon lime zest
• 1 can (15 oz) chicken broth
• 1 1/4 cup water
• 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lime juice
• 2 teaspoons granulated sugar
• 3 tablespoons fresh chopped cilantro

In a saucepan combine rice, butter, garlic, lime peel, chicken broth and water. Bring to a boil. Cover and cook 15-20 minutes, until rice is tender. Remove from heat. In a small bowl combine lime juice, sugar and cilantro. Pour over hot cooked rice.

Creamy Tomatillo Salad Dressing:

• 1 cup light sour cream
• 1 envelope Ranch salad dressing
• 1 1/2 envelope Fiesta Ranch Salad dressing
• 6 tomatillos, husked and cut in half
• 1 clove garlic, minced
• Juice from 2 limes, freshly squeezed
• 1 1/4 cup fresh chopped cilantro

Combine all ingredients in a blender (put the liquids in first!) and blend until smooth. Store in the refrigerator. Can be stored in airtight container for up to 2 weeks.

Black Beans:

• 1 can black beans, rinsed and drained
• 1 1/3 cup tomato juice
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 teaspoon ground cumin
• 2 tablespoons olive oil
• 1 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 2 tablespoons fresh chopped cilantro

In a nonstick skillet, cook garlic and cumin in olive oil over medium heat until you can smell it. Add beans, tomato juice, and salt. Continually stir until heated through. Just before serving stir in the cilantro.

Crispy Corn Chips:

Preheat oven to 400 F. Slice corn tortillas into thin strips. Bake for about 8 minutes.

For the tortilla we like the tortillas fiom Costco that you bake yourselves. If using these bake as directed and add cheddar cheese to the top until lightly browned. If using regular tortillas, you can put the tortilla in a pie pan in the oven with cheese sprinkled on top until warm

The meat, rice, dressing and beans can all be made the night before or over a several day period and will last in the fridge so it's not so much work all at once. Enjoy!

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Sunn 0))) - Berlin, Volksbühne 2006 - Part 2

Pure Misanthropic Hatred caught on tape. Hail Xasthur and Sunn o))).

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Two Good Newses

Note: The do not think the title reads "Two Good Newsies," because there is no such thing as that, Christian Bale notwithstanding. I like to pretend that movie never happened, and that I never saw him performing NKOTB dance moves like some kind of Mouseketeer. Everyone, please indulge me in this.

Good news #1: Remember that job in L***n? They just called and asked me to come in for an interview. So I'm excited to actually have one of those things. It's not until after Thanksgiving, but I'll let y'all know when to start sending prayers, good vibes, and voodoo chants my way!

Good news #2: The Utah Chocolate Show. Did anyone else know about this thing? I'm going Saturday and I cannot even wait. You just wander around and eat chocolate the whole time! I'm going to ignore the part where it will probably be American chocolate rather than European chocolate, because addicts can't always have principles.

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Die Grosse Stille (Into Great Silence) trailer

How I wish to be mesmerised by the silence again... I can only make do with this trailer...

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Oh dear

Normally this is the kind of thing I would leave to the Go Fug Yourself girls, since they do this for a living and are brilliant at it. But I just could not leave this one alone, and so far they haven't said anything about it. Once they do, you can forget whatever I've said.

First off, please let me say that I admire Emma Thompson so, SO very much. I think she is gorgeous and talented and smart. She started her own comedy troupe. She dated Hugh Laurie in college. She writes and acts and gets Academy Awards for both those things. She wrote the screenplay for Sense and Sensibility and got the lead role and got all her friends to be in it. And then she married hottie Greg Wise who played Willoughby. Take that, Kenneth I'm-So-Great Branagh! So, yes. Nothing but admiration.

The only thing that's tricky about her is that despite all that sense and wit she sometimes turns up in public dressed in really, really strange and unflattering outfits. Which brings us to today, when I saw this picture of her at the premier of Stranger than Fiction. (Sorry I can't post the photo here but I didn't want to sign up for a WireImage account.)

Seriously. What. Is. That. It looks like an ice-skating outfit gone wrong. Maybe she thinks the scarf helps, but it would need to be lots, lots bigger to cover that up. It gets worse when you see the whole thing. I bet poor Dustin Hoffman didn't know where to look.

Even though Emma Thompson is fabulous and has the credibility to dress however she wants, I really wish she wouldn't. It kind of makes me die a little bit inside.

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The saddest story ever

So when I was 10 I saw Beauty & the Beast and fell completely in love with it. It gave me hope that girls who spend all their time reading will still be able to get boyfriends--handsome, rich, furry boyfriends. And for the record, I think the Beast is way better looking than the Prince. The Prince looks like a girl.

When the VHS came out I rode my bike to the BX and bought it, spending $15 of my hard-earned babysitting money.

When the new Special Edition was released at IMAX theatres Amyjane and I went to see it. Loved loved loved.

When the new Platinum Special Edition 2-disc set was released on DVD Amyjane and I both pre-ordered our copies at Costco and got a great deal.

Then tragedy struck. I don't have it anymore. It's gone. I couldn't find it when I packed all my things up last year. And now I find out that they don't make them anymore so the only way to get it back (short of setting up a Brute Squad to find whoever took the original and break their knees) is to buy one of the still-existing copies online. And I'm poor.

So here's hoping I get this for Christmas so that I can repair my shattered dreams and deep, deep sense of betrayal and loss. Mom, Dad, the link is right over there on the sidebar. And please make sure it's the 2-disc set instead of the 1-disc copy! I love you!

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Cradle Of Filth - Her Ghost In The Fog - Alternative Lyrics

Hohoho! I'm laughing like a lunatic on the loose.

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I'm in an elephant graveyard

Remember how a couple of weeks ago I talked about singles wards? Well now there's an entirely new thing to report, namely my new singles ward, about which I'm not sure what to think or feel.

Jenny & Ed's bishop turned up last week to say Hi and I asked him about the singles wards. He said there's a BYU ward for for the students & younger kiddies and a really big stake singles ward that seems to be populated by the 25+ crowd--a couple hundred of them.

This, to me, was good news. He said this ward must be good, because it had people driving down from SLC to be in it, which confused me a little bit. Usually it's only the really tiny wards who are so desperate for members that they'll fudge on the boundaries.

So on Sunday I got all dolled up in my cute brown Wal-Mart skirt and my light-pink boat-neck 3/4-sleeved tee and my hot brown shoes. I planned to get there early but didn't actually sit down in the chapel until the opening hymn had started. Hate that. Now my family will heap scorn upon me.

The ward choir (2 boys, 12 girls, 2 tone-deaf loud boys, bless them) sang and people gave talks and all that normal stuff. The chapel was packed with people. But as I looked around I saw a lot of people who did not seem to be in their 20s so much. More like 30s. And possibly older. When the bishop got up to make announcements he welcomed the visitors and new people and told us all to fill out a new member sheet to determine if we're "eligible" for membership in the ward. Kind of like it was a country club or something.

So. While I was out in the hall getting my picture taken for the ward directory, I asked a few not-so-subtle questions and figured out what was going on here in CrazyWardVilleLand. This ward is a special ward, with special rules. The age limit has been increased to 40, and, in some circumstances, 45. Which explains why a grey-haired man came up and introduced himself to me. Some people don't even join the ward--they just get their name in the directory and they come to all the social events, of which there are many (4 this week). These people are called "permanent visitors." One girl I talked to lives in Springville and attends a ward there in the mornings and then comes up to this one in the afternoons. Another girl said she tried the family wards for a few years but got sick of being put into Primary so she started coming here.

One cool thing about this ward, though, is that there are a LOT of international members. The girl who taught the Relief Society lesson is either from Brazil or Portugal, there are Korean and Chinese members, and I talked to a couple of guys and a girl from Latin America. I think I heard a South African accent during Gospel Doctrine. I'm not sure why that is, but that's fun.

It was kind of disorienting, I must say. Of course I've only met a few people so far, but it's just funny. My standards for how young I'll go have totally fallen by the wayside--I'll date a 21-yr-old if he's smart & mature & with it. I just didn't think I would end up needing to decide how old I'll go. Because it turns out I still have some rules there. And 45 is a bit high. Because you just know that's how Michael Douglas gets out of stuff.

"Sorry, Catherine, my hip is acting up again. If I change a diaper the whole thing might just pop right out!"

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Who has three thirds of a master's degree???

I just got my degree results!

A 70 or better on the dissertation means that I Pass With Distinction, but by the end of writing it I was so stressed and sick of the whole thing that I had to just focus on passing and convinced myself to quit thinking about the distinction thing because it doesn't matter.

Only it TOTALLY DOES! And I GOT IT!!!

I got a 73% on my dissertation and a 71.3% for the program. Rejoice with me!

Am off to update resume now.

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Tourniquet Cut

I finally filmed something down... Yay!

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Loving the new car

It is so so very nice. I never thought I would end up with a car this nice--at least not right now while I'm all unemployed an' junk. I was looking for a cheapo college car, and the nicest I was willing to go was a Honda Civic. So I went to test-drive one and the guy said they had an Accord that was actually the same price. I got a deal.

Full disclosure: I did not make full use of the bargaining chip that is "paying with cash." I should have tried to get them to knock some off the price that way. But I turn into such a girl when it comes to car things and I'm not assertive at all. Next time I will be prepared. I did make the guy wash it though, so that's a small victory.

I feel like such a grown-up in this thing. It even has a CD player! I have never owned a car with a CD player before, because they were all very, very basic cars and I was too cheap to just buy one and install it. (Note: when I sold my 1996 Hyundai Accent to my little sister Spitfire that was the first thing she did. The total destruction of the transmission came later. As did the wreck.)

It has keyless entry, and every time I lock it with my little remote thingy I push the button an extra time so that the horn will honk at me. And then I chortle madly with my teeth bared and innocent passerbys are made afraid. I imagine this urge will wear off in time.

My love was made full when I called to set up my car insurance and found out that I will actually be paying less per month than I was for my old 1999 Corolla. Even the USAA agent, who is from Arizona and is my new BFF, was surprised when she came up with the final figure. Turns out choosing the Accord over the Civic was a good idea, because the Civic's reputation as America's Most Stolen Vehicle would have made my insurance more.

So now if Santa could just come up with a job and a sugar daddy my life will be pretty much complete.

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Rammstein - Ich Will Voelkerball DVD

I cannot wait!!!!!!!! UGH! Gah!

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I'm really quite irritated by The Man right now

I've decided that it's not good to be unemployed. AND it's not fair.

First I tried to apply for an Delta Skymiles American Express credit card. I had one before but cancelled it last year because I didn't want to pay the yearly fee when I wasn't going to be able to use it in Ye Olde Englande. But when I called up to get a new one, the lady on the other line had a huge problem with the fact that I don't have any employer info. I told her that I have savings and student loan money, which I'm living on now while I look for a job. And I would be happy to provide documentation of my sources of income. That wasn't good enough. Unless I have someone writing out a check to me every month it doesn't count. Please don't ask me why they won't give me one and yet my sister & b-in-law who definitely do not have jobs have a Platinum Delta Skymiles American Express card. And no, I'm not a jerk for bringing that up, because Jenny brought it up too, at which point I yelled "I KNOW!!!" in the manner of Monica Geller.

So. Hate those people.

Now for the car. I've been looking for one of those this week. It's an important purchase for me because it will enable me to get to job interviews. Not that it isn't cool to have my sister drive me places with two babies in the back seat, because it is. I found one that I like and started calling around to find out about getting an auto loan. I started with my bank because they're the ones I got my last one from. (And PAID IT OFF EARLY, MIND YOU).

But they freaked out when I said I didn't have an employer. So I asked if I could get a co-signer. They said sure. But when I told them my dad lives in AK they said nevermind, they only like people from Utah County. Because other people steal. And might not be Mormon. Or possibly it's because they're a credit union and they can do that. Their brilliant solution was that I should wait until after I found a job to apply for a loan. I refrained from bellowing into the phone that I'm looking for a library job and it could take years and how the crap do they expect me to FIND a job if I don't even have a car. And lest you think I'm being unrealistic, I've applied for a job in Logan, which is several hours away. Public transport won't cut it there.

Then I called the company that I do my auto insurance with, because they do loans too. Same story. Only they will let my Dad cosign. But by that time I was just sick of the whole mess. I know it's just the way things go and they don't know me personally or anything, but I'm so financially responsible that it's kind of sick. So it's a bit demoralizing to have long lists of people tell me that I'm too much of a risk and that I'm just some unemployed freeloader and that if I weren't so lazy I could have had a job by now and also they're guessing by my voice that I'm fat and maybe it wouldn't hurt to run around the block a few times and lay off on the ice cream.

So you know what? That's fine. I'll just pay cash.

Please meet my 2002 Special Edition Honda Accord. I'm picking it up this afternoon. Mine is red. And has a sun roof. And no one will be making any interest whatsoever off me.

TAKE THAT, SUCKAHS!!!

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I miss Fantasma

Yes. I miss Fantasma. Alot.

I hate TrustedHub. It's an obvious sweatshop. Enough said.

Thanks to work, I totally forgot that Norwegian guitar god, Yngwie Malmsteen is in Singapore for a one night only gig today! I feel very bad, being such a self-proclaimed professional metalhead of me. Ugh. Hate work. Hate work.

Blah.

It's wake, repeat, tired, sleep again. I hate life. With holiday Lectolocausts and CCAnal propagation programmes coming up, I lament at myself, "When exactly can I go into my vampire timezone and hermitage?" I need those 2, especially when life is so full of nonsense nowadays. And, I have planned to do self-education or simply put it, Autodidiact, on ancient civilisations, more philosophy and to read Dune stuff over again.

I should see money as something less significant. Yes, I should.

At this point of time, I would like to say,
Forlat ditt svake legeme,
Lingnemesis 9th Nov 2006 CE

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Dibs!

Living with Jenny has introduced a complication that neither of us were prepared for. Suddenly we are both wanting to blog about the same things. So we've worked out a very good system, which is called whoever yells "DIBS!!" fast enough gets to blog about it.

I called dibs on the girl ahead of us in the Wammart checkout line last night. She was buying the following:

• fat-free yogurts with sprinkles
• 2 frozen South Beach Diet meals
• 1 bag of M&Ms
• 1 huge box of frozen fish sticks

Explain that to me. And don't say that she's buying them for someone else because that's too reasonable. As I mocked her in my head I looked at my own purchases and wondered what a stranger might think of them:

• 30 plastic coat hangers
  
• 1 red laundry hamper
• 1 lint roller
• 1 Fall 2006 issue of Martha Stewart Weddings magazine

So yeah, anyone looking at that would assume that I'm a tragic spinster who spends my nights doing laundry and planning seating charts for my Imaginary Wedding.

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Tell Me Why-Declan Galbraith

Oh my! Another boy talent! Schweet!

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China Black Metal.

Curious me saw some sample mp3 files of a China Depressive Misanthropic Black Metal band, called 原罪。And, I tell you, it blown me off completely.

One of them, from their Demo CD, called, 秋月，starts off with wayang singing and er-hu at the background, then this demented voice full of hatred comes ripping open your heart, with the heavy droning guitars and drums to follow suit. In total, 7 minutes of pure misanthropic madness. It's almost like Aborton Void, but better.

If this CD ever reaches Singapore's shores, I'm getting it. Metalheads reading this, go check out this brilliant new band from China! Chinese pride!

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That's it

It was -1 degrees Fahrenheit this morning on the way to church. That's -18.3 degrees Celsius for all you Brits and other non-Fahrenheit folk.

Too cold for me. I'm out. I'm flying America West tonight and will get to UT tomorrow, where my sister assures me that it's a balmy 50 degrees. Also the Preciouses are there. And my new bed, which I will blog more about later.

Let's hope I can sleep on this flight. One year I was asleep on the Anchorage red-eye and the lady next to me spilled her Diet Coke on my lap. Another year a different lady spilled her rum on my brand-new black leather boots from Topshop. I do not have good luck with these things.

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Völkerball!

I cannot wait one more second for Völkerball!

14 days to it!

Waiting for it is comparable to orgasm denial! Ugh! Pah!

Enttäusch mich nicht,
LingNemesis.

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Fun with Val!

Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
这位师主为和要大开杀戒？
Valie: linlin! says:
因为我不爽你这位臭和尚
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
娣子劝您放下屠刀，立地成佛吧！
Valie: linlin! says:
我今天不铲除你们，我就不叫蔡淑娟！
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
您有二十三个小时来把娣子的人头取下！
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
来啊！来啊！
Valie: linlin! says:
哈哈
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
师主，为和吗？
Valie: linlin! says:
我才不会费尽力气来收拾你
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
好的。
Valie: linlin! says:
lol
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
师主明白了我佛慈悲的大道理了！
Valie: linlin! says:
haha
Valie: linlin! says:
才不呢！
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
师主！您要吃报京一胎丸吗？
Valie: linlin! says:
不要。
Valie: linlin! says:
lol
Valie: linlin! says:
你是和尚还是神龙教教主？
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
神龙教，万岁万岁万万岁！
Valie: linlin! says:
lol
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
我是白龙使！
Valie: linlin! says:
我是龙儿。
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
哈哈哈！
Valie: linlin! says:
小心我用化骨绵掌把你碎尸万端!
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
我要吃面！
Valie: linlin! says:
吃面自己煮。
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
我可不怕！
Valie: linlin! says:
lol
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
我有神龙教的令牌！
Valie: linlin! says:
*pary*
Valie: linlin! says:
*pray*
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
哈！怕了吧？
Celebritarian - Völkerball says:
煮面！
Valie: linlin! says:
lol


哈哈！好好玩！

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Die Große Stille

With no idea of what will be confronting me, I sat down at my seat at the National Museum's Gallery Theatre and embraced myself with the thought that I am about to sit through a nearly 3 hour long film. With no dialogue or background music. At all.

Darkness, grainy imagery, red candles flickering are things that greeted my curious, unknowing eyes. After getting myself comfortable in my seat, I placed more focus on the film. With the monks shifting their feets around the chapel in darkness for another good 5 minutes, my ears are taking notice of the silence of the film. Shifty I am, with eyes darting around glancing at who's seating near me and much thoughts in my mind, I have yet to be subdued by the silence. Yet to learn the appreciate the silence. Yet to integrate into the silence.

More imagery of the monastery life, monks getting initated, praying in their solitary cells, washing of plates, shaving, shoving of snow out of pits, prayers, trees, the aerial view of the monastery, hymn-singing sessions, walking along the hallways, eating, cooking, walking up the snowy hills, rains. The sequence of the above repeats, loops again and again, maintaining its solemn pact for absolute silence.

Soon, an hour into the film, surprisely, the thought-filled mind of mine transformed itself into one that gave thoughts into the rich imagery that the film offers. My ears, following suit with my mind, grew accustomed to silence. It's quite an achievement considering I'm on drugs for metal almost 24/7. To the extent of feeling uncomfortable if I were to shift my posture in my seat as they caused considerable amount of noise. Now, I am in the monastery. I am the monastery. I am silence.

Soon, the film was over as soon as I am getting increasingly appreciative of the eternal silence. I stepped out of the theatre, commenting to myself, "What an unique film!", adding, "I haven't wasted 6 dollars."

Sure a refreshing piece of work, and an obvious achievement in the documentary genre. If you are free for 3 hours and 6 dollar rich on next Friday night, treat your tired ears to a feast of silence and be mesmerised by it. Today's noise-polluted generation needs a dose of this. I assure you that you would come out a different person with greater appreciation for images and silence.

I rate this 5 sound-proof rooms!

For more silence: Here.

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Marilyn Manson - This Is Halloween On Leno

Your voice is the voice of God.

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Book Sale Eve

Tomorrow will be the culmination of all the work I've been doing at my notjob: The Book Sale. If I have to take away only one lesson learned from all of this it is that I should never again waste my time inscribing witty and heart-felt messages into books that I give as gifts. I now know what you people do with them. So many of the books that we're selling have inscriptions from loved ones, spouses, grandparents, children, and friends written in the front. And every time I see one I feel bad for the giver who took the time to write it when their pieces of crap friends and relatives are just going to get rid of the book anyway. I mean seriously, who even raised these people?

Today I got to boss around a bunch of teenaged cadets. They call me "ma'am" and "ma'am yes ma'am." It was kind of awesome. Their job was to load the shelved books onto carts and then wheel them to their designated book sale area. One cadet was loading the books onto the cart one . . . book . . . at . . . a . . . time. He would pause to look at the front and back of each one. Eventually I asked him if he liked reading. His answer: "Not really." So then I was all torn, because the reader part of me thought, "Maybe one of these Oprah book club books will catch his eye and he will want to read it and it will be the start of a whole new life of knowledge and light and non-delinquency, and so I should not do anything to damage the tender plant." The other part of me thought, "Okay, MOVE IT, kid. Or I swear I will take that copy of A Million Little Pieces out of your hand and beat you with it."

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Mmmm . . . donuts . . .

Mom made the donuts last night and they were fabulous. I ate about 14 of them and only stopped when I began to feel shooting pains in my left arm. I was on trick-or-treat duty and I even gave candy to the big kids despite the ice-water running through my veins. There were some really cute li'l kids, including one little boy dressed as a duck. He was new to trick-or-treating and kept trying to come into the house, thinking that was how the whole doorbell-door-open thing works.

Here's a pic of me and Mom in our Halloween finery.



And here is my Winter Wonderland and the reason why I have Christmas carols running through my head 78% of the time. (The other 22% consists of lustful thoughts, swear words, and plans for global domination.)

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